Don't give a -

I don't give a flying fuck.


Jesus Christ, what was I on? Was there meth in the air? Fuck.
The only problem is the summer's going to slow. It'll speed up! Don't go fuckin ballistic because you're by yourself for a few days straight.

That's what happened, folks.

Now that I'm justified, I'm clearing the roads. Check out A Thirsty Book in about a week; I'm going to try and write two more chapters.




Fuck yo mama.
Fuck yo sista.
Fuck yo grandma.
Fuck yo dog.
And most of all, fuck you!

I didn't read it, just went with it.

It seems your impetousness has gotten the best of you.
I think you're catching on. Glass violin and candle wax pearls, the smoke pours.
from a cognac bottle, we drink up the shape of our eyebrows, the angle of shine in a bed of hair. bed of roses. never been...my life. =
Fall apart and make the plastic drift from between two hands like it is supposed to.
Mithc. I can't say the same for myself.
Start again.
Cubeology. Cubism, is that so? I can't stop thinking about you.
You've got a nice structure your looks. I can't explain what's so ...
your breathing. I want to hear you again. Invigorating. This has never been so intense, ------
Maybe I should write this out first. I don't know what I'm supposed to say. The extent of my vocabulary is so low,
you have caged the interior of my mouth. Just the throat. I think , then I don't, then information overload, then
buzzing and ambulances, the whir of a kettle catching too much fire. The scent of fly-trapper adhesive, sticky sweet,
the picture of your face crumbles like a block of incense.
You never come over anymore.
Sparkle- guitar.
I can't believe it, the tears are chaffing me. I feel like an imbesile. You win!
Goddamnit... this is so strange. Why. I can't help but write about you. I can't help but write about you. I can't help it. Help it. Help it. Help it. Help it.
I'm gonna fuckin scream it out! Bash in all the back-doors in the neighborhood, let myself into the damp night searching for a map and a ticket.
Stale perfumed summer. When I used to go out I would know everyone that I saw. Now I go out alone, if I go out at all.
Burn , the wheel turn
-s and mosaic of leather and spice
hide my face, .
substance to diminish possible traces of weakness.
peach i cant stress it enough.
you you youo you youyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyouyou.
All I need.
DAMN
IT
TO
HELL.
The connection. Oh, it kills me because it is so intangible. So. so so so so so so so oso s.
You make me repeat myself. I wish it could be labeled emphasis, but it's not, it's again, again, again, again, again.
Over. Turn my body so you can see my spine and pin it all up the way you want. Finger in the fire. MELTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
Jesus Christ this is overwhelming. I don't want to wake up to coffee and the smell of cigarettes without that familiar distant unknown sihlouette curving the bed.
I can do whatever I want!! 32 weeks, oh, 32 weeks, weeks weeks weeks. Legal is an issue? What about running?
I ... am not writing anymore. You're getting the picture. Just thoughts. Streaming consciousness these are my thoughts. I am pretending to think a lot.
No I am really thinking far more.
Hold my breath.......................
You make me wonder about that other 96% more and more . Seconds mean nothing. I don't want time to stand in the door any longer. SCREAM THE LAKE IS
FALLING
If only it were a basement.
A clover scent like red oil
It would need to be crushed so the corners couldn't get air.
Oxygen, chemical mixture
lungs oh the oh the oh the oh the pressure builds feels like a box in my esophogus
kill me





















..........You want zombie? I'll feed. This. Way. Please.
{I've never felt so close, oh sombra}

The Secrets We Speak Through Teeth

I knew there would be a cherry syringe for me, and a little slouched chair to recline in.


-That's all you get.

you know what niggah

"A bunny will be president before any black person. " - Rachel

A peach is a peach

Peach
To see a peach in your dream, represents pleasure and joy, You take pleasure in the minor, trivial things in life. The dream may also imply that something in your life is just "peachy" and going well. Alternatively, a peach may be indicative of lust and sensuality. Consider how it may be a metaphor for your sweetheart or loved one.

Writer's Block -- Attempt 4 (4/21/o5_)

cool chewing tactics not
meant forred beasts
a compromise made shifty ghosts,
in and out of wall boards,
the hall
-boards are vacant like the
little crevice in my bra,
al-
ways unsnapping and letting soft
globe
go rub
against black cottonfields

he sees you, smoldering your fingers
between
them sits
a thin Capri, oh, cancer-sticks
delicious brown seeping ash
a core that wants to be but isn't
and never
unless you become one
and it empregnates the lungs
beautiful bastard, jewel-white smoke and shiny mouthpiece.
for an armed baby.
hurt me tenderly in the waning moonlight, scamper
tauntingly,
his eyes become saucers at
notice
of
your sexy death.

Where is my mind?

all my feelings right now, as my thoughts are exactly

i screwedup
bangupjob
goodwork
royalscrewjob
screwup
screwdriver
i am no game
where is my mind
where,
is my mind
i...swimming in the carribbean
lukeskywalker
paradise-free
now with more lemons!
collateral
his hair is yellow
like turpentine
only turpentine is not yellow
catch my drift?
cart-drifting in the local kroger
why do i love drug stores
dear sweet merciful crap
crying into the pillow
so what if you didnt make the cheerleading squad
youve got catherine zeta-jones right
in front of you
so many cans
i outta make a robot
just like peggy on king of the hill
ever watch that show?
it's 8:57.
where is my mind?
where,
is my mind
pixies
pixie dust the color of sandpaper
pink rust
diseased couches aching in alleyways
a beautiful brown,
antique green
shady comfort goose down soft
can i touch his hands?
what will i wear...yeah, yeah.
where is my mind?


---

Writer's Block -- Attempt 1 (4/18/o5_)

crisp white
blouse, with all the right buttons.
soft beard, red lips.
we drink coffee til
our packs are gone.
drug-crazy bonanza.
cruella, mixhazard.
perfect at last.
mix breasts.
Mizuhaiku.
water poem?
Delve into these glassy
depths.

a touch that burns like a
witch's oils,
concocted,
simmer, thin jade in the pot,
glittering; porcelain gods can't
do you no good

it's the dry amber in your throat,
the menthol perfume, and such
pink nails,
gossmer and shallow.
wine and swallow.

---crippled mountain of stolen words,---
--not plagarism, fucker, the---
-----taking---------
----------of words------
-----literal, acidish yellow--------------
----------------legal pads with strike-outs.---

she opens a book only to close it
tonight, dust and stars go hand-in-hand
like wires behind the desk

like wires behind the desk

and a red crystal spoon to feed us
atrocitiesandclankingshudder boards
peeling paint the color of old rain
notes that were folded
back so, they tear in the creases

ever scrawl on purple?

i do.


shaved heads and plump thighs,
muscle and shiny dark hair, -/
stampinkwipe
kissmove straddlebeanbagmeltmelt,slamdoor
rolling pin,yellow again.

And when it all comes out distorted, I can only push pedals into thin dying embers, green leaves sprawling like crepe against these creamy moon-spotted shoulders. Tighten grip and squeeze liquid from eyelash corners; an all-knowing pinata hanging low at the base of the cerebral cortex, waiting for a fatal blow, where innerds go spewing satisfactory.
To touch the flesh of a certain exterior would be...a nebulous activity...haywire, dizzy, dreamy. I imagine faint curtains sputtering quick to chase night-stars from a blackening horizon, and your hard fingers slip through red silk.
Connotation.
Intrigue.
Don't put the light on, I only want a spark, a crystal shard glowing juxtaposition with white.
mass-produce words. Chew an earlobe.
Tangled between the palms, a c-shaped thigh, and little pearl earrings.
Luscious beneath black.
Comb your nails on someone's back.
Hotel sanctuary. Keep me. Closer.
Don't swallow whole and then spit up pieces.
I want.
Originality....if that is the proper word to use...
Is this the start?
I jump to conclusions.

I'll dive next.

---